Beyond Good and Evil: The Path to True Resilience
“Within your shadow lies great power”.
Resilience is a virtue that people talk about a lot. Resilience is the ability to adapt and adjust to life’s challenges.
One way we weaken our resilience is by standing rigidly in a belief—by seeing life in black and white.
A mind that is caught in black-and-white thinking—good versus evil—will inevitably lead to experiences where resilience is lacking. If we think about the opposite of resilience, we could call it fragility. And fragility is often the result of a fragile ego.
The ego becomes fragile when it adopts a belief as the absolute truth. We see this in society through religious dogmas, for example. This same energy is what causes people to attack each other, and it is what keeps places like the Middle East trapped in the repetitive loop of war throughout history.
We love to talk about a “great awakening.” It sounds inspiring, almost like a fairy tale. But awakening is not always comfortable. In fact, it can be very challenging, because awakening requires that we grow up.
A child throws a tantrum when something is taken away from them. In many ways, humanity behaves the same way. We live under the illusion that something has been taken from us. We are still trapped in the illusion that life is about survival—about gaining versus losing.
With that mentality, evolution is impossible.
To truly develop resilience, we must learn to stand in the only place where real certainty and safety exist. Paradoxically, this place may not feel solid at all in the world.
It is the place in your heart—the altar of your wholeness—which is pure love consciousness. It is what many traditions call non-duality.
Let’s not confuse non-duality with a place that has no morals. I do not need a dualistic mindset in order to stop someone from kicking a dog.
I am speaking about the deepest level of consciousness—not the moral structures that help keep society in order.
Unfortunately, many people today are distorting what non-duality actually means. Recently, for example, Dr. Demartini—an expert in human behavior and author—was accused of promoting evil simply because he refused, during a very popular podcast, to label certain people as evil.
He stood in truth.
He was speaking about the shadow of humanity, and most people are not yet ready for that conversation.
And yet, we must talk about it. We must face the so-called “evil” inside each one of us. All the parts of ourselves that were denied and repressed will eventually be projected outward.
“For the Shadow is never more dangerous than when the conscious personality has lost touch with it.”
John A. Sanford
Let’s talk about how some aspects of modern psychology may actually keep people from “growing up.”
A great coach or therapist—something that is rarer than we might like to admit—must practice non-duality. And the only way to arrive at that place is by looking honestly at the darkness we carry inside ourselves.
No one transforms their inner shadow simply by reading books or collecting Ph.D.s. We must walk the territory of the shadow.
Otherwise, if I sit with a client who is trying to heal their mother wound—perhaps because their mother was abusive—I will not deny that the abuse happened. But I also cannot label the mother as evil.
The moment I do that, I take a side. And in doing so, I unintentionally keep my client trapped in the role of victim. I would still be relating to my client as a wounded child rather than supporting their growth into wholeness.
This dynamic happens in many therapy and coaching offices. I am not here to accuse anyone, because I have done it myself. There were times when I was unconscious of my own darkness and projected my own judgments onto my clients’ caretakers.
This is a stage that many healers and teachers pass through.
So if we want to cultivate resilience in a world that often feels like it is on fire, we must keep our hearts open and continue expanding our minds. This means challenging our black-and-white beliefs.
Until we face our fears, our shadows, and even the darkness within ourselves, we will continue calling others evil—and that will keep humanity trapped in the same historical loop.
Yet this is also an extraordinary time to be alive. We now have access to profound knowledge reminding us that we have far more power than we imagine to make a difference in this world.
We can participate in creating the kind of world we dream about.
Remember, this life is like a dream. And when you begin to awaken from the dream, you can participate consciously—helping create a dream that reflects the only true reality: Love Consciousness.
May Peace Be with You, Alex.
P.s.: Are you ready to become more resilient? Book a free call today.